Relationships part 2

It has come to my attention that I am pretty bad at dealing with my friends' relationship problems or relationship issues, honestly the reason why I don't care is because frankly relationships are not a priority in my life right now. Many friends come to me whenever they have problems and I have learned from experience not to say anything that I would normally say because said friends will only get mad at me for being me. To me I don't want to come off as frigid or cold when it comes to relationships, because I do want one eventually in my hopefully 100 year old life, but right now it is just not a priority, I don't want one , I don't need one, I don't feel that one is necessary to continue on in life. I give advice based on how I perceive what is important in life, and I do not think that a relationship is the main priority in college, college is meant for learning and for procuring a future, and if that said relationship is a hindrance in your path to your future then get rid of it, it is not worth your time, it is not worth your future. If you are in a relationship that you are doing fine in, no problems, no conflict, all love, then by all means proceed into your journey of love because relationships that only have love in them have no space for wasted time and wasted emotions. There is no point in crying over spilled water, that water's gone, just pour yourself some more water. Don't come to me if you want someone to sympathize with you in a relationship, I can't help. I do not possess the ethos in being able to help you, I have never been in a relationship and therefore I do not have any prior knowledge to hep you with.

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-Eric Kim

Class

Class is so draining physically and mentally

I went to sleep at 11-30 yesterday, and I woke up and then I went back to sleep and then I woke up again, I really don't know why I can't get a proper night's sleep. Whether im doing homework or whether im studying for a test, or whether my roommates snoring, i just want a decent night's sleep. so sad so bad

So tired

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-Eric Kim

BZ

I hate studying I really do, doesn't give me proper time to fill out a proper blog, with proper thoughts. I can't wait to go home and sleep in a proper bed and eat a proper meal and be around proper people.

Discover...

Myself

BREAK TIME!!!!

So as I sit in Gateway writing my clearly overdue essays, I feel like I need to write about something not academic, and so I shall.

and the topic shall be....

God's gifts to the individual person.

I believe or I shall choose to believe that God has blessed each and every single individual with some type of talent or gift. Be it dancing, singing, sports, orations, or what not.

I know that some who do not believe in God believe that practice can make anything perfect, but in my 18 years of life as a Christian (although I can't say i've been Christian for all 18 years), I can't agree with those who do not believe in God.

I think that God has blessed each and everyone of us with a talent that we have to find ourselves, that we have to work to achieve, but most definitely it is there within us.

For example some people are BORN to dance like my SPOP staffer and inspiration, Marissa Osato. Watching her dance inspires me and awes me, and I believe her talent is the product of God's benediction, her own dedication, and her own passion for the art of dance.

I have yet to discover my own gift, probably because of my lack of dedication to try and find it.

There are times when I think that God has blessed with me the gift of singing, but then again I am not very good at singing, so I push that aside. And being introduced to the world of dance I hope that my "gift from God" is dancing. JUST starting to dance, I will not make a judgement yet, I will continue to strive to become better, and if I do not get better I guess dancing is not the thing for me.

Whenever I hear an amazing voice, I am inspired to start singing again, but I have experienced many disappointments when it comes to singing. I was rejected constantly from group after group in high school, yet the people around me told me that I had a decent voice, I did not know which group of opinions to believe. On one side people that "know" the talent of the voice have judged me and declared that I was not good enough, and on the other hand people that care about me say that I DO have a voice. Knowing that my friends and family would probably avoid trying to hurt me I decided to believe that I was not talented enough, and completely gave up on singing. And it also seems that many of the opportunities that I was presented to sing, were shot down. One example is the Benefit Concert of 2009 that I was planning on auditioning for. I practiced for a couple weeks with Rilla Peng, and for the first time in a long time I felt that I was good at singing, but then a day or two before the audition I was, I guess I could say cursed with some sort of throat infection and could not audition. Was it God's wish that I not sing? Or was it just a fluke illness, I guess I will never know, but after that I put aside singing. Yet each time I hear someone on youtube, or hear someone in person that other people think are good, I think to myself (not to sound conceited) "wow I know I am better than that person."

Whether it is dancing or singing, or probably something else that does not have to do with performing, God HAS blessed me with something, and hopefully I will be able to find that in the remaining 3 and a half years that I have left of college.

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-Eric Kim

My parents

Before I go full throttle study mode and productive mode, I think I am going to write about parents. The reason I am writing about parents is because while I was eating lunch at commons today, I overheard this girl complaining about her parents. Although what I am about to recall is not word for word or dead on it basically summarizes what she said: "I asked my dad to give me money so I could buy something I wanted, and he only gave me 20$, like omg how am I supposed to buy anything with 20$ my dad's so dumb."

^That completely irritated me. What kind of rude and disrespectful person talks about her parents that way. Obviously she has not learned the values of life, because she has not learned that parents have sacrificed everything in order to provide for their children.

I have much more to say about my parents in particular, but it will have to wait, because for the next 3 hours I am going to work my ass off to get SOME work done.

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-Eric Kim

Amigos

I know i've had the best of friends for the longest time, but there are those times when I find myself saying to my self "wow I am so blessed to have such amazing people as my friends."

Whenever my friends talk to me about the problems that are going on in their lives, they never forget to ask how I AM doing in MY LIFE. People that care enough to ask how I am doing even though they have come to me for advice, are the people that I call my friends.

I think I am a very interesting person, in the sense that I am not a normal person, I honestly think it is very hard for someone to get close to me, and I do not loosely throw around the term "friend." A reason for this reluctance to automatically accept people as my friends, I do not know. I have never thought of my "hard to get close to" personality characteristic as a burden or a curse, actually I think of it as a blessing, because it will only let me acquire and meet friends that are filled with merit.

For anyone that has met me recently, and has made attempts at becoming my friend or trying to get closer to me, keep trying, because although I might come off as a "cold person" sometimes, I am trying to to become friends with you.

And to any of my current friends that might read this, I thank God every single day that I have people like you in my life that talk to me, laugh with me, EAT with me, look after me, and care for me.

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-Eric Kim